A New Start, A New Mantra • April 2016
Over the past 6 months, I have been struggling more than usual to keep up with all the demands of work, life, and health - and have come to this shattering realization:
it's never all going to get done. Let me repeat that, for my own benefit:
IT. IS. NEVER. ALL. GOING. TO. GET. DONE.
Even with all the to-do lists and trying to keep track of tasks, projects, messages to return, the endless volume of email, and doing my very best to stay on top of everything, I have been failing miserably. I take great pride in being a high performer at work and have pretty much let everything in my own life slide in the futile attempt to try and keep up, and I've realized that that just does not work anymore. I am tired ALL the time. The sparkle in my eyes has dimmed, and I have completely neglected my own well-being - and that has got to change. It's time for ME to change.
There will always be more demands than there are hours in the day - that's just the nature of corporate life in this day and age. I hear the same story everywhere. But how I view it all, and most importantly - how I respond - will impact the level of stress I feel and the amount of joy I experience during my limited time here on Earth. That part is a choice, and within my control.
Most of all, I just want to feel good again. Not lethargic. Not sick. Not tired. Not weak. But energetic and vital, with life force flowing through me and bringing out that magic that is within me to give.
So with that in mind, the new mantra for me is this:
And whatever doesn't get done/answered/completed - I can only do my best and let go of the rest.
It is more than a little frightening to be putting this out there as it's been a lifelong pattern to pretty much live at the speed of "GO!" and putting my professional life ahead of my own, but I guess I just needed to reach the point of no return. Thank goodness I haven't seen some kind of diabetes-related impact or gotten some horrible diagnosis - this is very much a proactive change. I just don't want to feel so sick and tired anymore.
So with that, it's a new beginning - one day at a time, with baby steps of progress and being relentless about self-care.
Cheers to new beginnings, lifelong learning, and personal reinvention! It never ends.
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