The Reinvention of Me • January 2015
It has been over a year since my last post in Sandy's Corner. While 2014 had many highlights and achievements and moments to remember, it was utterly and completely exhausting. Writing fell by the wayside. Zero vacation time. It felt like a nonstop sprint from beginning to end - pretty much a "running-with-hair-on-fire" stream of high-intensity projects, product launches, conferences and seemingly neverending deliverables. Throw in a flood in my apartment right before Christmas, and I was brought to the end of my rapidly fraying energy rope by the end of the year. Meltdown, anyone? No surprise there. I hadn't done what I needed to do to take care of myself.
I am incredibly blessed to have work and a team at Animas that I love wholeheartedly, and I get to work on and support inspired projects that make a difference in the world. For that - I am beyond grateful. But I'm also someone who likes to say "yes" to things, without much consideration for my personal time or priorities. For most of my adult life, I have been driven to serve, serve, serve the people and communities I love - but I have come to the abrupt realization that I cannot do that at the expense of my health, personal life, and well-being. There is nothing noble or awesome about that. And the only person responsible for changing that is me.
As I've found with most things in the Divine unfolding of life, it takes some kind of crisis for me to really look at making a change, and to do the difficult inner work required for lasting and meaningful personal transformation. I've been pretty good at avoiding having to deal with issues I know have held me back in some key areas of life - but I know now that I want more. It's time.
I hired a life coach! The coaching process has been forcing me to think about the things in life most important to me, and causing me to look at negative/destructive patterns and behaviours that I have been ignoring for a really long time. We're going deep, and it feels bold and uncomfortable, but I have never felt more ready to go there and clear away old stories I have held up as the truth, and to look honestly at what drives me and why I do what I do and make the choices I make. We humans are complicated creatures, and I am determined to get out of my own way.
It's going to be a big year. I will finally be out of debt in 2015. My apartment is getting a makeover. I'm writing again. I'm getting better at saying "no" without guilt. My fitness is getting back on track, and I'm keen to address my struggles with food, diabetes, and my weight. Heck, I've even opened my heart back up to dating again! And yes, I will be taking ALL of my vacation time. :)
Miracles are in the air, my Prince Charming is somewhere out there waiting for me, and I'll do the inner work to dare greatly. I can't expect different results if I only do what I've always done. The fun is out on the "skinny branches" of life, after all. That I know for sure.
Cheers to new beginnings and lifelong learning,
Inspiring others to live inspired lives
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